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Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

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Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

Salt, Or Lack Of

Production of said Title has been postponed indefinately due to a complete lack of time and or the drive to actually finish the horrorpiece.

Translation:

Work + New Battlefield Clan + Still Having A Life = No More Salt.

However at some point I will edit what I've written so far and post it here for your viewing displeasure.

Bane of Your Sack

You know it's funny, I've spent the bulk of my life attempting to dodge physical labor whenever possible, that is not to say that I'm lazy but why do shit the hard way when you don't absolutely have to, right? So it's incredibly odd to find myself actually enjoying the menial back breaking slave camp workloads I've been doing. I come home, tired, aching, having blisters in places I didnt know you could even get blisters......but I love it, it's almost as if the pain's a magical healing elixir for whatever the hell is crossfired in my head. It hasn't even been a week since I hit the floor and already I'm not only back into shape but my endurance and strength are just growing each day.....and the really odd thing is, I went into this expecting to be bored out of my skull figured I'd have to fight to keep my mind on the task at hand but somehow (and this just boggles me) I'm fully alert the entire course of the day and it's....kinda weird, but kinda liberating too. But being the realist I am...how long can this truly last?....we shall see, but who knows maybe this is exactly what I need

Mufasa FTW

So something truly weird has happened, and you'll never see this coming. Me, being the incredibly persistant royal pain in all your asses that I am. Have won. Yup, I frakking pwned the lovely bitterness that had managed to take hold, and yes...that means that whiny lil emo bastard part of me has been shot to death repeatedly at point blank range with a sawed off 12 gauge pump action loaded with explosive fucking shells. (Imagine the mess that made on the carpet...)

So soon now, very very soon....It's party time. There's a bottle of absolute chillin on ice soon to be joined by some jager, red bull & some ice frakking cold beer....and then it's time to totally get ripped out of my fucking skull, so who wants in on that shit? (you know how to find me)

Eternal

A Shining Finger Extends To Greet
Secrets Lost The Day They Meet
Sanity's Soul The Dark They Keep
Freedom Bleeds As They Flee
Such Horror Depraving Dignity
The Blood Spills The Rivers Soak
Face The Dead Your Life They Dread
Surrender The Pain Embrace This Shame
Die In The Name of The Game

Evelution

Alrighty.....been a while since I posted something, so uh....where to begin......im working again, won't mention where since those that need to know do and we don't want any unwanted visitors just showing up thus forcing me to end their life as quickly as possible. I've decided there's no point in seeking out a significant other as it's only a matter of time before they either a) start playing games as all females do, or b) shows her true colors and turns out to be another drama loving bitch.....both of which I simply have no desire to deal with.....it's time to return to an old evelution of myself....and yes im fully aware I spelt "evolution" wrong, but I didn't.....because I'm talking about Evelution not Evolution.

Evelution for those of you few few fuckers in the know, is what I call each stage of my existance. It's like a new level you attain in a RPG, you suddenly find yourself with access to new traits & abilities you never had before...and honestly it's been far to long since I leveled up but that won't last for long, I'm fast approaching this next Evelution and it's gonna be a Mighty one......of course there's always a downside....in order to become this next new monster, something must die.....which is troublesome becuase this little aspect of Evelution is completely out of my hands.....so we'll just have to see what happens..

No Place Left To Go

I know the pieces fit....

....but they just won't meld together, another wave of this storm has hit my levee's have crumpled and I no longer wish to resist. I've grown so tired of putting myself back together after each wave, to make matters worse I don't even want to try this time instead I find myself considering other means to the end of this misery I call life and to be honest they become more appealing with every passing moment.....so what do I do?

..cuz I watched them fall away

Madness in a Revery

I've lost control
this world is slipping
this fire will be
the death of me
I'm so angry everyday
It's been caged for to many days
and the pain is slipping away
replaced by the unquenchable fire
set free by such dark twisted desire

I'm falling faster then I can soar
There must be a reason I've been so ignored
your laughters fleeting my arms are reaching
grasping for a grip this whole life's been a trip

I've lost myself in this revery
this musics just drifting away
I've had enough of all this shit
all I want is to be rid of it
the feelings drain as
this angers injected in my veigns
im crying out looking for an answer
something to numb the rage
my release has become the frustration
another burden resting on my cage
the bars are bending the ceilings wanning
and this just might be the end

For Real This Time

Alright, I said it before but got lazy and lost interest, but this time I mean it. I went ahead and laid down the mental frame work for what will become my twisted vision. Yes that's right, Salt is going to become a working reality. I'm gonna spend a little more time working out the details internally before actually committing anything to bytes however in the meantime any sick, depraved, horrific, painful, acts of torture and vengeance you people can think of feel free to submit them to aid the creative process, I've opened up comments to all should you feel the need to participate.

In the meantime, you all need to head over to myspace and rock your ass off to my current song before I tire of it and remove it. In case your already too late, the song was The Unseen "Scream Out".

17 WTF

What do you call a couple that has 17 kids, all whose name begins with a J and still want more? FUCKING GOD DAMN RETARDED!  These people should be locked up and beaten to bloody frakking bits or at the absolute very least fucking castrated.  I mean 17 kids? What the fuck is wrong with you? For Fuck's Sake Use a Fucking Condom.   This angers me, how the fuck can you possibly give 17 kids the required amount of time and attention they need to be fucking NOT a knife wielding killer?....fucking idiots

For any who think I make this up, though I wish to god I were:

http://www.cnn.com/2007/LIVING/personal/08/03/17.kids.ap/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

Frequency

So what would you give to find someone that understood you? Someone that you don't need to explain yourself to becuase they're already thinking on the same wavelength.  No I'm not talking about soulmates, they don't exists I'm referring to someone that actually operates on the same crazy stupid rare frequency I run on.....someone that finds my twisted lil mind entertaining, even when I cross the little imaginary line that most people consider "messed up" becuase hey, I am messed up but damnit it's entertaining

Currently Playing: 

That's Enough - Dark New Day

Transformers

So, who woulda thought a movie based on a cartoon about robots that transform into toasters, cars, and CD players could possibly not suck? Yea, I was thinking the same thing....but I must say Transformers blows you the fuck away.  It's quite possibly the best movie I've seen in quite some time, lotsa action a surprisingly interesting plot, Megan Fox is smoking fucking hot....and lets not forget the amazingly awesome new Camaro makes an apperance in the form of Bumblebee, kick ass. All in all a good fucking flick, definatly worth a watch or two.

Blood on the Verizon (Extended Edition)

It was a pretty nice day, the sun was shining it was hot but not quite to hot and everything was fine for everyone everywhere....except for verizon online "high speed" DSL subscribers.  These poor people are constantly plagued by shitty customer service, bad connections that always drop, and snail like speeds that make good ole dialup on the 56k modem look like a NASCAR race.  

On this day at this time, Verizon's incredibly shitty overall business policy has turned into a death warrant, as well it should how can anyone run a business like this and expect, in this day & age not to get brutally murdered for it?  Well this day, the bill came due.  Becuase one man wasn't going to tolerate the incredible inconveniance and frustration Verizon's actions were cuasing him, He'd had it before, but now the net was down agian...and this was the straw that triggered a homocidal rage.

The door opened a chime chimed a clerk looked up to see his last sight, the hilt of a dagger protruding from his forehead.   By the time the first droplets of blood began dripping down the clerk's face another blade had found it's way into the chest of a costumer who had previously been checking out the latest overly trendy cell phone's, it was as this poor bastard's body hit the ground that the first horrified scream rang out.  Within seconds a half dozen more followed the first, amplifying as another dagger lodged into a second clerk's arm with a sickening thud-crack as it both embedded and broke the bone underneath.  

It's a small store, cramped...little cover, no where to run no where to hide, but more importantly only one way in & out.  A perfect death trap.  No one was sparred, within two minutes all three clerks as well as the afternoon's customer's lay stacked in a pile behind the counter, their blood telling the tale of why this tragedy had to happen.  The writting was literally on the wall, "Fix Your Fucking Internet, Or This Is Only The Begining." 

In The Blink of an Eye

a dawning twilight

focused in the headlights

the moment slows

a pulse echoes

in this eye blink

you stand on the brink

by the time the lid rises

your soul will be gliding

on the wings of angels

your burdens will be shed

as your body lay dead

in this moment you are free

from here till eternity